What's Been Happenin'

Holy balls you guys! I have missed you! I've planned to get back to blogging about a million times, and then I always get sidetracked! My apologies for my extended absence, but I've had a couple of things going on - and I foolishly allowed them to keep me from you. I think I might be getting my crap together, so there should be smooth sailing from here on out!

I thought I might give you a rundown on what I've had going on the last month or two - and hope it is an acceptable excuse for going missing.

As many of you know, I was on the job hunt. I know I tried to explain to you what that was like (job hunting is the new dating, etc.) - but the best word to describe it was: STRESSFUL!! I was nervous because I hadn't had an interview for a job in like 14 years...little did I realize that was the least of my concerns! I wasn't even getting calls back for interviews! Seriously. I sent out what felt like a million resumes, and nothing. No response. No phone calls. No nothing. Well - that isn't completely true. I did get two responses from shady people who wanted me to work for them because they travel so much, and were out of the country. No thank you. I wouldn't do well in prison.

So the panic set in. And with the panic came laziness. I stopped going to the gym. When I could have used the endorphins most, I decided sitting in my friend's basement and stewing was the better option. (I can make some really good decisions). Skip forward a few weeks, and all of the sudden it happened! I was contacted back by three places. I had phone interviews, and two actual interviews (the third one found someone with matching experience, so I was out of the running). I got one of the my actual interviews. I am now the office bitch at Keller Williams Realty. WOOT! I love all of the organizational, behind the scenes stuff - so this is a really good fit for me. I kind of love it. I also genuinely enjoy the people I work with - and even more shocking - they seem to enjoy working with me!

So I started work on August 1st. Then I had Family Fun Weekend. Then I had to find a place to live. Then I had to pack. Then I had to move. By September 1st.

The apartment hunt was interesting. So many people are renting now, that there isn't a lot available. I went on Craigslist and looked around, and magically found something that is perfect! And it ended up being really close to my sister, her hubby and my nieces and nephew. Perfect! The application process was a bit of a mess - but everything worked out, and I was in! I recruited some fantastic friends and family to help me move on the 1st (basically just took my stuff up to my apartment, threw it in, and then went for pizza).

It has taken me about 2 weeks get fully unpacked. Labor day weekend was a loss - my youngest sister was visiting from Chicago, and it was Granny Kay's 80th birthday party that weekend. I lived among the ruins for a while, but it is finally coming together. And this weekend I get to shop for a new couch!


Then I realized that in my haste to figure out how to schedule my life (it is a major adjustment going back to working full-time after over a year of foot-loose-and-fancy-freedom), that I had forgotten to worry about hooking up cable/internet. That further delayed my return to you. I will work on getting that up and running next week. In the meantime, I will just have to go to the "business center" in my building, and use one of their computers to stay in touch with all of you!

So that is it. That's what I've been up to. It may not sound like much to you - but it was enough to sideline me. =) So now it's time to pull it back together. Start eating well, again. Start going to the gym, again. Get healthy...again.

I'll be back, soon! No more of this "months between postings" business!

Hope you all are well, and enjoyed your summer! Now let's bust it!

Under Construction

Any good Minnesota resident knows - if the roads aren't covered with snow and ice, then half of them are being ripped up and repaired in some manner! It seems I can't get anywhere these days without merging, or detouring, or both. It is kind of how I would describe my life in general right now.

Nothing is easy. Nothing is a straight shot. No task can be completed incident-free. Or at least this is the way things seem. Now it could just be my crazy brain is giving me this skewed interpretation....and it is extremely likely that that is the case...but it is still causing me angst. So I am going to take things back, to when I shared everything with you guys. I'm going to be honest - not that I was intentionally trying to not be honest  - but I've gone off the grid. So here we go...here's my vomiting of facts: (that paints a really pretty word picture, doesn't it?)

• My slacking has been completely unacceptable for the month of July. There is really no other way to put it. And because I am going to earn that iPad - I am now in big trouble for August! Lots of ground to make up. But I will do it.
• I have been eating like absolute crap. Not just a little. A LOT. Lite on the veggies, heavy on the grease. It is not a recipe (pun intended) for success.
• I have actually had a few interviews/phone interviews over the past couple of weeks - and hopefully they'll turn into something. Someone has to realize how magnificent I am - right?
• I have allowed my obsession over my job-hunt completely derail everything else. It made a really handy excuse to be lazy as hell.
• One bright spot right now is that a book is printed, with my name on it, and that is pretty frickin sweet
• I have determined that alcohol is not my friend. It makes me walk into pools with my clothes on. It makes me sing karaoke. It has even caused a victory dance to be choreographed, and performed, by me. It basically gives me the green light for all things jackass-like. I need to go back on the wagon. (Please note that I don't have a drinking problem - I've gone over-board twice in the last month, and that's a lot for me over the past couple of years. It is just one more thing I've let slip.)

The one in the blue is me last Saturday night!

 So that's what I've been up to. Just derailing and obsessing. I had made a comment, or at least thought about making a comment, in a previous post about how job-hunting is like dating. It is true. Or at least it's like my form of dating. Or what I can remember of dating ... it's been a while. Here are the similarities, as I see them:

• Sending out a resume is like giving out your number. You wonder if your resume will get them interested enough to pursue you. With a guy it's like: Will he call? Did he like what he saw of me enough to make the effort to learn more?
• The interview is like the first date. With the interview you get kind of nervous. You try to be yourself, but it's a guarded version of yourself. Same way on a first date. You get butterflies. Some friends need a cocktail or two before, just to settle their nerves. (hey - maybe I should have been doing that before my interviews?) You try to be as honest as you can without over-sharing. You try to be witty, and sound smart, and smile. With the interview, or the guy, you don't want them to see all of your crazy up front! You want to ease into it over the next few (or few thousand) meetings.
• Post-Interview and Post-first date: will they call? Was I what they were looking for? Did I say too much? Should I have shared that story? Did they think I was qualified - to be their office bitch, or their girlfriend - because everyone has a bit of a checklist? Did I scare them away? Should I have laughed at that? I was basically just being myself - - was that too much for them?

And I've discovered a negative of this cell-phone carrying, always in touch, day and age! (I can't even believe I'm saying this - because I LOVE MY GADGETS!!) But if you were starting to date before the world had cell phones you might be able to relate to this - - you got sick of staring at the phone, and willing it to ring. You could feel yourself going batty, hoping he'd call. So what did you do? You got the hell out of the house! For any reason! I'm going to go for a walk. I'm going to run to Target, and wander for an hour. This would be the perfect time to buy stamps! Whatever you could come up with to kill some time so you didn't just sit there, gradually losing your mind. But now there are cell phones, that we carry with us at all times. And we get our emails directly to those phones. I am so grateful for technology most of the time - but now it is a bit of a curse!  No matter where I go, it's with me. Taunting me with it's non-ringing and non-email-indicating-buzzing. The good news is that I leave it in the car when I'm at the gym. So I talked myself into going today. It was a nice break. =) And hopefully I'll be able to do it tomorrow. And the day after. Until something fantastic comes my way, and this nuttiness can subside.

So there you have it. Job-hunting is the new dating. And cell phones, for all of their great perks, can be the devil.

I hope you're all having a more productive month than I am! I promise to be more inspiring going forward. Enough is enough!

the stress is great within me

make that tacos, and that's been me

This week I've learned that a good positive attitude, and being really optimistic, only takes you so far - and only lasts for so long. Being fully immersed in the job-hunt is stressing me out! And as I have learned - I have some opportunities for improvement where my dealings with stress are concerned! When I'm feeling stressed out, I hoover anything filled with fat and salt. A deep-fat-fryer becomes my best friend. I guess something about the sound of my arteries clogging relaxes me? I also learned earlier this year, as an added bonus, my hair falls out! Awesome! Nothing hotter than a greasy, bloated, bald lady - am I right fellas?!?!

So the good news is that I was able to identify last week that I was in my stress-spiral, and tried to yank myself out of it. I stocked the pantry with healthy-ish vittles, and tried my best to be strong! I have learned (see also: been reminded of) a couple of things:

1. I LOVE grapefruit. Cut it in half, with a packet of faux-sweetener, and go to town. Delicious.
2. Plums are yummy. That is all.
3. Crystal Light might actually be saving me from having complete organ shut-down
4. When you stop eating a lot of salt, and simultaneously go back to the gym - your pancakes come back at full-force!
5. Job hunting is like dating. You wait by the phone (or computer) wondering if they'll call (or email). You wonder if you said the right thing. You wonder if they'll like you. 

And although I can totally identify what is going on - I still can't stop myself from wanting to eat crap. Just last night I had to have a REALLY stern talk with myself. It was almost 9pm. I wasn't hungry. But I still wanted to go get tacos. Why? I have no damn idea. But I totally got the win.

I guess I was just feeling stress about the job hunt. But maybe I need to get some perspective. I have been hard at it for like two weeks. A number of the jobs I applied for didn't even close until last Friday. I have moments of extreme positivity, where I'm sure there is someone out there that is going to realize what a fantastic employee I will be, and how much value I will bring to their company. Then I have the lows - which is also tied to my need for immediate gratification - when I don't understand why I haven't heard from them within 24 hours of sending in my resume. I just need to take a chill pill, and trust that something fantastic is coming my way.

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I am not a person who is typically content to "drink" their calories. I want to actually eat. I need the satisfaction of chewing. But in the summer, post-workout, I am OK with a protein shake to hold me over for dinner. Here is the recipe for the protein shake I'm in love with! It uses powdered peanut butter!! The whole thing is only 260 calories - and it really does fill you up!

• 1 heaping scoop of (VegaMixx??) protein powder (I am using vanilla, because they didn't have chocolate - and it is still delicious) = 100 calories
• 2 Tbls powdered peanut butter = 45 calories (SERIOUSLY!)
• 1/2 sliced banana = 55 calories
• 1 cup almond milk = 60 calories
• ice cubes/water = 0 calories

I use my Magic Bullet, and it is ready in less than 1 minute. Instant gratification is my friend.

UPDATE!! BOOK NEWS!! I guess they are going to reprint in paperback later this year - so it will be available in stores like Barnes & Noble around January 1st! That's pretty damn exciting!!





Do you notice you eat more based on certain emotions? How do you control it?

Hot Fun in the Summertime?

**Note: I just found out this weekend that some people are having an issue posting comments to my blog. I have NO idea what is causing that - and I am so sorry!! If you have a comment that won't post, please email it to me ( natalie@slimmingdowntosexy.com )and I will post it for you! I LOVE the comments people leave, and am totally bummed that it isn't working!! I guess that is what you get for a free program? Please don't stop trying to post them! **

Now - on to the post:

A couple of year ago, while working a collection event, I realized a shocking thing about myself. I would prefer for it to be hot...and I'm talking 90's and humid....than have it be cold. I know. I couldn't believe it myself. And when you factor in that the slightest amount of humidity in the air makes my hair turn into a lion's mane, and makes me start sweating like I'm on fire - it is even more unbelievable.

ouch!

When it appeared that summer had finally arrived last weekend, I got a bit beside myself. My usual sound "pro-sunscreen" stance was temporarily shaken by jubilation over actually seeing the sun. I lathered up my face, but figured the rest of me would be fine - I was only going to be out there for a "little while". How stupid am I? My pasty winterized flesh didn't stand a chance! I was also not thinking clearly when I left Bonnie on for a while - providing me with not only a fantastic red hue - but giving me a sweet band around my ample arm. I took Bonnie off after a while, so I could burn my strap mark, also - but not before a glistening white stripe had been left. I hate being sunburned! I hate the feeling of heat radiating from my skin! I know, I know - I should be used to it! Someone as hot as I am should be used to radiating heat, right? haha But seriously. No more of this. The sunscreen Nazi is back on duty! Just in time for a nice cold snap. (it was like 50 degrees and raining at my cousin's graduation party Friday night) No worries about over-exposure to sun this weekend!! Only in Minnesota.

Speaking of that graduation party - it was kind of brutal. There were a ton of people there that I haven't seen in years. And what do people you haven't seen in a while always ask: "where are you, now?" and "what are you doing these days?". Not questions I love to answer. Let's see - "I am currently living in my friend Linda's basement until the end of the summer, when I will hopefully (segway into answer 2) have found a job I love so I can get out of there, and find a place of my own to live in". These are not answers that make me seem like a settled adult - which you definitely should be at 36. Right?!?! I was reminded by a friend that I could have told them about the book - but that just isn't how I roll. I talked about it with the few who knew about it, and asked - but I didn't bring it up. I get an F- for self-promotion. I suck at it. So I tried to muster up all of the positivity I've been feeling the last couple of weeks, and forge on - with the help of a little sarcasm. My standard answer: "I'm living with a friend in Shakopee until the end of the summer. Hopefully I figure out what I want to do when I grow up by then." Good answer? I thought so.

On a more positive note, I also saw the high-five lady at the gym again on Saturday. She remembered me, and we bonded again over how tough it is to get to the gym and work. I think I may have made a new friend. =)

I have one more thing I wanted to share. Let's call it a: Slimming Down to Sexy Food Review. If you are like me, and think string cheese is awesome - I have a note I wanted to share. I have found that I l.o.v.e. Frigo Cheese Head variety. The regular is only 80 calories. When I was at the store the other day, I saw that they also had a "light" version. It was only 60 calories per piece. I figured it was worth a shot. Mistake. In my humble opinion it is not worth saving the extra 20 calories. The regular one is so much more flavorful! I felt like the light variety was kind of dry, and pretty bland. And when you're treating string cheese as a total treat, because it tastes pretty salty - you want all of that flavor. Am I right?!? So there you go! Regular = delicious, Light = dry and flavorless.

Do you have a question you fear? Or a snack idea to share? I'd love to hear about it - and hopefully this program lets you post it here! =)

getting it together

The last 15 months have been a festival of challenges - all self-created - but challenges none-the-less. I had some things to sort out in this life of mine. I found myself unemployed, in debt and unmotivated. I fluctuated between feelings of frustration, helplessness, panic and annoyance about 95% of the time. I felt like there was no way to fix it, and the pressure I was putting on myself to come up with a solution was crippling.

About two months ago it came to a head. With the help of my family and friends - I finally figured out how to dig myself out. I am almost completely debt free, and that is an amazing feeling. I didn't really realize how negatively my debt was affecting me until it was gone. Now I am so optimistic! I feel like I'm on the verge of being responsible. I feel like, for the first time in years, I am finally moving in the right direction in all aspects of my life. I am just certain that everything is going to work out the way it is supposed to.

I finally have my resume put together, and will be looking for jobs. (I am open to suggestions =)) I know it is a really crappy time to be searching for a job - but I'm not sweating it. Something fantastic is going to present itself.


There is absolutely no replacement for the feeling of getting your crap together!! I feel motivated - to go to the gym, to write this blog, and to start being a productive member of society. I can see success in my future, again - and that is something I've been missing for a long, long time. I see myself actually sticking to the mission we just started ( Move It 2 Lose It ) and finally getting that scale to start moving down. I see myself working toward being able to do things - physically - that I haven't been able to do in....well, as long as I can remember. I see myself finding a job that makes me content, and allows me to live the life I want to live - and be the type of person I want to be. I see myself working on finishing this book - because I'm finally starting to believe I might have something worth sharing. 

In short - I am feeling a little bit kick-ass lately, and I'm loving it! I want to thank all of you for sticking with me over the last 15 months - and inspiring me enough to not completely quit while I went through my life crisis! I attribute not gaining all of the weight back to you guys - because had I not had you guys supporting me, I'm sure I would have. I appreciate all of you. You're phenomenal. Now let's get moving, and make this summer everything we deserve for it to be!

What makes you feel like you could take on the world, and win?

Are you up for the challenge?

It is Monday as I type this, and I have a number of challenges extended to myself. Some fitness-based, some nutrition-based, some career-based, some overall-life-based. I'm makin' plans. I refuse to call them goals, because as many of you know - goal-setting for me tends to produce the opposite, undesired, outcome. I am my own worst enemy. I have self-destructive-personality disorder. And I apparently sometimes think I'm a doctor. =)

These "plans" aren't anything I haven't set as goals a million times - but it is necessary for me to start getting some structure to my days. Hopefully I'll be going back to work soon, so I might as well get used to actually having to get things done! Here's a little idea of what I'm working on:

• Finish my damn resume! I have some really great references, but am stuck at trying to turn (I seriously just typed "tern" before I was like...duh! It's TURN!) my non-skills into things that a company cannot live without. I am an under-seller, so this job is proving to be ridiculously hard! (and apparently I have to leave "competent speller" off my list of skills!)
• Get my ass to the gym at least 6 days a week and lift weights 4 times (2 upper body days, 2 lower body days) per week. The weights start this Thursday. It could be dangerous. Hopefully I can straighten my legs and touch my face by week's end.
• Stop eating like crap. I have 1800-2000 calories per day. It would be in my best interest to not use them on Cheetos. It would also be in my best interest to start planning before going to the grocery store, and STICK TO MY LIST!!
• Enough of the salt lick. I am going to limit myself to 2000mg/day of sodium. I seriously feel so much better when I do. 
• Get working on my book. I started a book of my own a few months ago, and it's just been sitting there. It is time to get cracking! I have so many genius insights to share with the world! I think at least an hour, three times per week, is a good plan. I know I can't force it, but that seems reasonable.

Those are my "plans" so far. I think my dad would be proud of me - I have even made spreadsheets to track a few of these things. I am finally feeling about 80% on my ability to breathe, so it's time to get moving!

I also had a request to start a summer mission, or challenge. I asked for ideas on Facebook and Twitter - but will ask here, as well. Do you have any suggestions, or requests, for a challenge? I'd like to have the first day be June 1st, and we can run it June - August. I have gotten a "total miles" suggestion, which I really like - but wanted to see if anyone else had any ideas. If you do, please comment here, or email me at: natalie@slimmingdowntosexy.com . I'll make a final decision by Wednesday or Thursday, so everyone will have enough time to sign up if they'd like! 

I hope things are going great for all of you, and none of you were affected by the crazy tornado's last weekend! Have any of you been making "plans" for yourself? I'd love to hear about them!